Reinvent Yourself (Don't stay in a state of self doubt) Be Assertive!!!

When you were a kid and had problems how did you handle them? Did you run away and cry, did you stop and throw a tantrum, or did you stand up for yourself, but with self control?

Many of us today if we looked back at how we managed our differences, and our challenges, we might just see a pattern a continuous cycle of self doubt that has kept us from standing up for ourselves and finding a way to grow and become stronger.

We might see the same problems we had as a young child, young adult and now as a grown up, that follows us to this day.

Self control and knowing when to be assertive can be very hard for some of us, and if you are one of them you will be able to relate to some of the bullet points/examples in this article.

I once heard that doing the same thing over and over and thinking somehow things would be different, is just insanity.

I agree….

With that said, if we want to feel different, and we want others to treat us different than they have thus far, then we have to make some changes about how we feel towards our own self. If we feel insecure and lack self assurance others will pick up on that immediately. They will try to use it against you, not all but some.

Let me tell you that confidence doesn’t have to be cocky, self absorbent, rude, or obnoxious. It is someone who cares about others but also holds themselves to a high level of degree and they are someone who doesn’t allow others to knock them down or feel badly about themselves.

High level successful people are those with the attributes mentioned above. They give respect to their peers, family, friends, etc, but they also get the same value returned to them.

If you want to make changes, you can, you can be the best you have ever been with change. I like to say that, you have to spend lots of time with you, so why not let you be the best you can be.

Rethinking, and looking at yourself in a different light is the first start. Begin accepting the things you can most definitely change and just simply toss out those that you can’t.

If you know you can’t without a doubt change something then why waste your precious time and effort over it. That’s just plain silly, move on and work on the rest.

Begin changing the way you let others opinions affect the way you feel. This is really important because to be successful and confident you have to feel successful and confident. If someone tries to belittle you, don’t allow it. They can’t belittle you if you don’t accept what they are telling you. You have the power to not believe their judgment and just move on.

There will be times when we need to speak up for ourselves, and that’s okay, but just be sure to keep a level head. Don’t be caught off guard and come out swinging, stay calm and be rational. The more assertive and rational we seem the more we will accomplish with the person that is being rude.

I like personally to read books that are about self improvement, encouraging, and motivational. These types of writings and studies help us to grow our minds and help us to understand how to handle situations that are unpleasant or not so easy to deal with. Because we have new people coming and going in our lives and each one is different, and some can be demanding or just plain difficult. So different authors present different outcomes to study and live by. Not all will help, but some books on relations, etc, just might have the right wording to set you off on a journey of self recovery/discovery.

I suggest if you are looking for ways to make changes in your life. Sit down and write out a list. Number that list from one being the most important to ten being the least important. Next write down how you can being to make changes to get the results you want for number one. Take it slow and work on the first thing on your list. Don’t go past number one until you have accomplished exactly what you wrote that you need for that first number. Then once it has been accomplished, get to work on number two. And so on………

A lot of us want things but we don’t want to do what it takes to get them. If that is you well then it seems you will have a hard time having the life you dream of if you aren’t willing to put in some effort. Nothing is free, and if it were easy, well we all would have hunky dory lives now wouldn’t we.

I’m going to give you and example; I wanted to be a writer. Well to be a writer, takes a lot of time and effort. And a lot of time spent alone, and well just writing.

Well, I would get up every morning and I always found an excuse for not writing.

SO…. How in the world am I going to be a writer if I don’t write????

I would get up look around see a million other things I needed to do and I would say I’ll write something later.

Well later never came.

I would begin cleaning my house, I would watch a little TV, I checked a few emails, I played around on my facebook, etc. You get the picture, next thing I know the day was shot and now it was late and I was too tired to sit down and write anything.

The reason I go into so much detail is to prove a point to you.

This article can be applied to just about anything you want to see change in.

Any aspect of your life, whether it is relationships, like I talked about in the first part of this article or it can be about other things you feel needs attention.

But if you are serious and you really want anything to change and be different, you have to do something you have never done before now.

So if you want others to look at you with admiration, you first must feel it for yourself, and the rest will follow.

You have to like you, you have to love you, you have to believe, and you have to truly want it and work at it, no matter what it is.

By working at it, I don’t mean just once, I mean from now on.

I wish you all success and goodness in life…

Best Wanda H.